Welcome to Just Commodores, a site specifically designed for all people who share the same passion as yourself.

New Posts Contact us

Just Commodores Forum Community

It takes just a moment to join our fantastic community

Register

Joke of the Day

Mavericks Choice

Well-Known Member
Joined
Aug 29, 2007
Messages
280
Reaction score
25,969
Points
93
Location
NSW
Members Ride
VF2 SSV M6, VF2 LS3 Calais V, VZ 6L M6 Crewie
I went the doctors & told him I keep thinking I'm a Moth! He said i can't help you. I will refer you to a Psychiatrist. I know that but your light was on!
 

lmoengnr

Donating Member
Joined
Jan 15, 2012
Messages
6,991
Reaction score
46,054
Points
113
Location
Sunbury Vic.
Members Ride
MY12.5 Maloo R8, MY12 Redline ute, Magnum 224
tubbycat.jpg
 

Mavericks Choice

Well-Known Member
Joined
Aug 29, 2007
Messages
280
Reaction score
25,969
Points
93
Location
NSW
Members Ride
VF2 SSV M6, VF2 LS3 Calais V, VZ 6L M6 Crewie
I grew up living paycheck to paycheck , but through hard work and perseverance i now live direct deposit to direct deposit.
 

Mavericks Choice

Well-Known Member
Joined
Aug 29, 2007
Messages
280
Reaction score
25,969
Points
93
Location
NSW
Members Ride
VF2 SSV M6, VF2 LS3 Calais V, VZ 6L M6 Crewie
My wife just said that if I don't get off my computer and help with the dishes shes gonna slam my head on the keyboard but I think shes jokinhwnnriowenjauhuhyfewbh48943983wbedjhhfws7hg873243nbiu2q378hgfdbuifqbqwuiehguh-asdhnjqweiorijndaklajhb
 

Mavericks Choice

Well-Known Member
Joined
Aug 29, 2007
Messages
280
Reaction score
25,969
Points
93
Location
NSW
Members Ride
VF2 SSV M6, VF2 LS3 Calais V, VZ 6L M6 Crewie
My wife bought 24 cupcakes for my grandson to take to school tomorrow for his birthday treat. I didn’t know that’s what they were for. I hope 8 kids are absent tomorrow.
 

Mavericks Choice

Well-Known Member
Joined
Aug 29, 2007
Messages
280
Reaction score
25,969
Points
93
Location
NSW
Members Ride
VF2 SSV M6, VF2 LS3 Calais V, VZ 6L M6 Crewie
FEMALE PRAYER
Before I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man, who's not a creep,
One who's handsome, smart and strong,
One who loves to listen long,
One who thinks before he speaks,
One who'll call, not wait for weeks
I pray he's gainfully employed,
When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed.
Pulls out my chair and opens my door,
Massages my back and begs to do more.
Oh! Send me a man, who'll make love to my mind,
Knows what to answer to "How big is my behind?"
I pray that this man will love me no end,
And never attempt to hit on my friend.
And as I pray beside my bed,
I look at the clown you sent me instead.
Amen.
 

Mavericks Choice

Well-Known Member
Joined
Aug 29, 2007
Messages
280
Reaction score
25,969
Points
93
Location
NSW
Members Ride
VF2 SSV M6, VF2 LS3 Calais V, VZ 6L M6 Crewie
Little Paddy was doing very badly in math.
His parents had tried everything...tutors, mentors, flash cards, special learning centers.
In short, everything they could think of to help his math.
Finally, in a last ditch effort, they took Paddy down and enrolled him in the local Catholic school.
After the first day, little Paddy came home with a very serious look on his face.
He didn't even kiss his mother hello. Instead, he went straight to his room and started studying.
Books and papers were spread out all over the room and little Paddy was hard at work.
His mother was amazed. She called him down to dinner.
To her shock, the minute he was done, he marched back to his room without a word, and in no time, he was back hitting the books as hard as before.
This went on for some time, day after day, while the mother tried to understand what made all the difference.
Finally, little Paddy brought home his report Card..
He quietly laid it on the table, went up to his room and hit the books.
With great trepidation, His Mom looked at it and to her great surprise, Little Paddy got an 'A' in math.
She could no longer hold her curiosity. . .
She went to his room and said, 'Son, what was it? Was it the nuns?'
Little Paddy looked at her and shook his head, no. . .
'Well, then,' she replied, Was it the books, the discipline, the structure, the uniforms?
WHAT WAS IT?'
Little Paddy looked at her and said, 'Well, on the first day of school when I saw that guy nailed to the plus sign, I knew they weren't fooling around.
 

Mavericks Choice

Well-Known Member
Joined
Aug 29, 2007
Messages
280
Reaction score
25,969
Points
93
Location
NSW
Members Ride
VF2 SSV M6, VF2 LS3 Calais V, VZ 6L M6 Crewie
Things I have in common with an avocado:
-If I’m just on my own I’m pretty bland
-I swing drastically and unpredictably from too hard to too soft
-I’m pleasant for only a very brief window of time
-I’m often found with chips
 

Mavericks Choice

Well-Known Member
Joined
Aug 29, 2007
Messages
280
Reaction score
25,969
Points
93
Location
NSW
Members Ride
VF2 SSV M6, VF2 LS3 Calais V, VZ 6L M6 Crewie
Blind pilot
A blind man was flying in a small plane with his brother, the pilot, when his brother suddenly clutched his chest and died.
After finally finding the radio, the blind man called for help and was answered by an air traffic controller at a nearby airport.
"You've got to help me! I'm totally blind, the pilot of this plane is dead, and we are flying upside down!"
The air traffic controll er answered, "I understand that the pilot is dead and you are blind, but if you are blind how do you know that you are flying upside down ?"
"Because I have **** running up my neck!"
 

Mavericks Choice

Well-Known Member
Joined
Aug 29, 2007
Messages
280
Reaction score
25,969
Points
93
Location
NSW
Members Ride
VF2 SSV M6, VF2 LS3 Calais V, VZ 6L M6 Crewie
Catholic Heart Attack
A man suffered a serious heart attack and had open heart bypass surgery.
He awakened from the surgery to find himself in the care of nuns at a Catholic Hospital.
As he was recovering, a nun asked him questions regarding how he was going to pay for his treatment.
She asked if he had health insurance.
He replied, in a raspy voice, 'No health insurance.'
The nun asked if he had money in the bank.
He replied. 'No money in the bank.'
The nun asked, 'Do you have a relative who could help you?'
He said, 'I only have a spinster sister, who is a nun.'
The nun became agitated and announced loudly, 'Nuns are not spinsters! Nuns are married to God.'
The patient replied:
'Send the bill to my brother-in-law.'
 
Top